“This is the darkest, most terrible timeline.”

A die chooses who retrieves pizza from downstairs; six possible departures produce different outcomes. In the disastrous branch where Troy leaves, cascading mishaps lead to the closing alternate-future scene, where Abed identifies the darkest timeline. The die decision is an ordinary trigger for wildly disproportionate consequences. A six-sided die opens into six cream routes. Five closed pizza boxes remain orderly; the sixth route breaks into a red fissure and a spilled pizza. Red lettering joins the fracture, carrying a tiny errand into an outsized disaster.